Feet

New year. New quarter. New classes. (New shoes!)

New people.

There’s always that one person. The guy who picks his nose, stares at it and then wipes it on the underside of the desk. The girl who chews on giant chunks of her hair. Or that person who taps their pen on every surface nearby (yes, I’m guilty as charged).

This guy was a whole new brand of...let's say "unique".

I’m sitting in lecture, as I am most days, enjoying the fact that my archaeology teacher is playing Indiana Jones for us. It’s dark, but my laptop is open just enough to illuminate the people sitting on either side of me. To my left, sits a good friend of mine, laughing along with me at the quirky (but studly) Dr. Jones. To my right, sits the guy who tripped over my new shoes on the way to his seat (can’t really blame him though…the rows of seats in this classroom are like sitting coach on American Airlines).

Anyway, we’re about to the point where Dr. Jones is cautiously switching out a bag of sand for the golden idol, when I notice the guy on my right stirring around in his seat. It wasn’t a “trying-to-get-more-comfortable-in-these-cardboard-seats” type of movement, but more of a “complete-rearrangement-of-limbs-so-as-to-sit-on-my-feet” sort of maneuver. So now, his muddy shoes are pressed right up against the side of my leg.

But it doesn’t end there.

This guy proceeds to take off the muddy shoes, pick at his sweaty toe-socks to finally expose his bare-stinking-guy-feet right in the middle of lecture. I could just see the fumes wafting up toward me.

I have a bit of an issue with feet to begin with. My rules of feet etiquette include (but are not limited to):

1) ALWAYS wear socks with shoes. No going commando in sneakers.

2) Wear socks to sleep. No one wants dirty, gross feet-sheets.

3) And never, ever take off your shoes in class!

So when I see this guy stripping his feet in public, I’m about ready to puke. And let’s look at this logically: it’s the dead of winter, meaning its cold, meaning you keep your socks (and shoes) on your feet!

Next time you find yourself itching to kick off those toe-pinching boots, be considerate and wait till you’re alone at home and in the shower.